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 Release (God's Gentle Touch)

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Ebrim5
PENCIL PUSHER (26-50 posts)
PENCIL PUSHER (26-50 posts)
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Posts : 50
Age : 52
Join date : 2013-07-04
Location : Colorado
Charity : Hope Worldwide

20130929
PostRelease (God's Gentle Touch)


Release. There are many forms of release that we face and deal with throughout our lives. Each form representing something different. Yet, how we define it in any given situation is what makes the difference. There are releases of fear, joy, excitement, wonder, sadness, purpose, trust, change, and accepting. Based on the matter at hand at the time deems one of these forms of release.
It can also represent challenge. Challenge when we struggle with allowing ourselves to release what needs to be let go. We try to fight it thinking we know what is best and yet without allowing ones self to release causes havoc and build up of emotions that get piled on top of each other. Not allowing the situation to be released produces a mountain of pain that in the end you are uncertain how to let go of it. So, we hold it to it, to the pain, to the hurt, to the fear, to the sadness, to the desire to own it even if it is not the best choice.
And so it has been in my life over the past several weeks. Not allowing myself to release has built up all of these feelings and emotions that have been bottled up. In that a wall of protection has been established that has caused my heart to pull away and try to hide from them. The reality of this all is that there is no way to hide from them, I am the one carrying them within me. So, in these times, my mind has been blocked from releasing it. My mind has been blocked in my thoughts and in writing. This past week, God has worked in my heart and has helped me to get in touch with the blockage. In doing a study on Paul it was brought to light that my fear of releasing was stopping me in every area of my life. Here is a portion of the study and some of my thoughts:
2 Cor. 12:7
Referring to the thorn in Paul's flesh. We often wonder what that thorn was and yet Paul desires for us to know why it was given him.
For us to fully understand The Lord we must at times become weak and not always be strong. 2 Cor. 12:9 talks about God's grace being sufficient for us as power is made through weakness. These verses teach us that Paul needed to remember that Gods power was greater than his and if he did not become weak he would never understand the full extent of Gods strength and power. The scripture says he learned to delight in weakness, in insult, in hardship, in persecutions, and in difficulties. For when we are weak, we become strong.
What this taught me again is that there are times of weakness and we need these times to help us grow deeper in our faith and in our walk. It helped me recognize that this thorn was given to me as a way of teaching me how to trust. To trust him more deeply, to trust those he has gifted me to help me on my walk, and to trust myself to know my triggers and be aware of them as a way of seeking advise and assistance. This journey the past several weeks has been tough. To my shame and sin, the wall of protection that has been built was a wall that in the end was closing the door to God and others helping me to work through it. The study helped me to see God was saying it it time to release, it is time to let go, it is time to allow those around you to help you out and be there as a spiritual support and guidance to get you through it. What it helped me see again is that we do not walk alone. If we walk alone it is because of our own actions and fears that put us there. And what I know for sure it that these were my actions. Yet, until this week and studying the struggles of Paul's heart I did not see it as sin. I saw it as protection. What it did however, is caused me to pull away. Instead of leading me to the cross, it was leading me to hide. And because of that the situations that have been a part of my life were tucked away and how they were making me feel was locked inside. It is not easy for me to express the deep feelings inside. The thought of doing so scars me to the point that I do not allow myself to release them. For so long, it was difficult for me to express them without feeling judged, or questioned, or doubted. My defense has always been to lock it away and build that wall of protection as a way of safety. After this week, it is clear that it is not safe. With each day that passed and each time I did not take or make an opportunity to release it caused more and more pain inside.
What I know for sure is that it is God's desire that we share what is going on, it is his desire that we are open and let others know the struggles that plague us. His word is our tool, it teaches us the importance of release, of communicating, of letting go of the schemes of the tempter and not allowing them to control or overtake us. At times, cause we are so used to our own defense tools we do not even recognize it as something that is hurting us and now allowing us to grow. This week it was all revealed, and with that took the time, made the opportunity and shared what my fears were, my doubts, my anger, my uncertainties. In allowing the spirit to work through the example of Paul, God removed the blockage from my heart and from my mind and in that am now able to put pen to paper and share my heart. What I know for sure is that writing is a form of healing for me, it is a way of expressing my real and true feelings, it also at times is a way of security. What I know for sure is that in writing everything is uncovered and laid bear. There is no escape in what is put into words. It also is a way of sharing as to seek input and guidance from those who are put in our lives to help us grow in our personal walks.
This week stands as a gratitude week, a week of change, a week of openness, a week of acceptance, a week of cleansing, and a week of release. What I know for sure is that our father is always working to help us, we just need to be able to let him in. This week the scales were removed from my eyes and this week the father spoke clearly and said my daughter lean on me, let go of the pains, the hurts and the doubts, please trust me that I am and will take care of you. Today, I am so grateful for his love, for his commitment, for his guidance, for his wisdom, and for his patience. It is he who has brought me through this, and to that there is no finer blessings.
As with every pen, make it a point to resolve any differences you may have with your family and friends. We do not know what tomorrow may hold. Do not be to late to apologize or make amends. Live in harmony with one another making ever effort to love and honor those who are in your life.
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