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 Grudges

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mmiller
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PostSubject: Grudges   Wed Nov 09, 2011 1:46 pm

We all get tired of carrying heavy purses, shopping bags or luggage. Even the smallest bag becomes cumbersome after a while. For a moment, think about the unseen bag you might happen to carry around ALL THE TIME....everywhere you go! I am talking about the emotional baggage that we carry around each day, specifically, that sack of GRUDGES, that some of us might happen to possess. We have all been hurt by others. If we aren't careful, those hurts build up into resentments and those resemtments develop into a grudge.

Once a grudge enters our mind, it happens to grow and grow and grow. What started out as a small wrong, either real or imagined, quickly can develop into a massive ball of envy, malice, jealousy, bitterness, gossip, slander, hatred, cruelty and self-pity. (Even those words sound heavy) All of these words of ugliness build up and turn us into a vindictive, cold and vengeful person. When this happens, we become our own worst enemy.

I was my own worst enemy for a very long time. I looked for reasons to dislike certain people. I took offense at the smallest slight. I remember telling people that I would 'go to my grave remembering what so-and-so did to me.' I convinced myself to dislike others. I was actually proud of the way I simply dismissed people without a second thought. Looking back, I am so ashamed of my actions. I see where I was so very wrong. I blocked my chances of fellowship with God. I hindered my relationship with Jesus Christ. I lost out on so many blessings, such as peace, joy and love......I was horrible!

It wasn't until I finally released my resentments that I realized how much I had been hurting myself. I learned to free my grudges by turning them over to the Lord. His forgiveness, His grace, His mercy and His love allowed me to let go of both real and imagined hurts, wrongs and grudges. By letting go and giving these things to God, I allowed myself to grow and to experience the joy of walking in the will of God. I no longer carry around that enormous sack of resentments and grudges....and for that, I am thankful on this day.

Leviticus 19:18 You shall not take vengeance, nor bear any grudge against the children of your people, but you shall love your neighbor as yourself
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oneagleswings
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PostSubject: Re: Grudges   Wed Nov 09, 2011 3:40 pm

This post makes me angry, I'll feel a grudge against you...I'm over it now.
Everone gets angry, staying angry is dangerous.
I am thankful for you and with you as well.

God Bless.

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mmiller
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PostSubject: Re: Grudges   Wed Nov 09, 2011 3:52 pm

Wow...you made me nervous for a minute...I thought you had gotten upset.
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oneagleswings
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PostSubject: Re: Grudges   Wed Nov 09, 2011 4:00 pm

Never get upset, just passionate.
I was this person you describe in your post as well and you are absolutely "write" even those words sound heavy.
Hate is a powerfully furious word, think about it...isn't it the ultimate negative four letter word? The roads this has led me on along with grudges I cannot begin to describe.
It is because I have a deep regard for your insights that I have been critical in the past, you can't grow as a writer if you are not challenged. On a Christian site some of us might be a bit too humble or sheepish to do so. But think of it, if your calling is to ministry you will encounter all kinds of people at different stages of Faith. And every person who reads this does not get the same exact message but you do it well. No critiques from me.
Excellent!


Sister Michelle,
please do not stop writing.
God Bless.
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mmiller
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PostSubject: Re: Grudges   Wed Nov 09, 2011 4:14 pm

Thank you! And, yes, please continue to give me honest critipue and opinions. I truly appreciate it!
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oneagleswings
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PostSubject: Re: Grudges   Wed Nov 09, 2011 4:18 pm

Big Smile

"critipue?"
It's a long way from the q to the p on a keyboard...if this was intentional, that's hilarious!
If not...never mind.
cri/ti/pue...?
Ingenius!


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Lora
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PostSubject: Re: Grudges   Wed Nov 09, 2011 7:02 pm

I love your sens of humor oneagleswings. You're a riot!

Anyway, back to today's message. It's a terrific message because it is such an important one. It is a message that has so many facets to it. For example, aside for the snowball effect I mentioned in the other response to this message, it can cause mental and physical illness in people. There are countless verses in the Bible on this subject, which suggests its importance:

See to it that no one falls short of the grace of God and that no bitter root grows up to cause trouble and defile many. Hebrews 12:15

"Grudge not one against another, brethren, lest ye be condemned: behold,
the judge standeth before the door." James 5:9

"Use hospitality one to another without grudging." I Peter 4:9
"Then came Peter to Him, and said, Lord, how oft shall my brother sin
against me, and I forgive him? Seven times? Jesus saith unto him, I say not
unto thee, Until seven times: but, Until seventy times seven." Matthew
18:21-22
"For if ye forgive men their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also
forgive you: But if ye forgive not men their trespasses, neither will your
heavenly Father forgive your trespasses." Matthew 6:14-15


When one is unforgiving, they tend to live an unhappy life, as you stated:

What started out as a small wrong, either real or imagined, quickly can
develop into a massive ball of envy, malice, jealousy, bitterness,
gossip, slander, hatred, cruelty and self-pity.

However, if one releases all of the anger and malice in one's heart it frees he or she up for happiness. There are some really terrific things that come from having a cheerful heart:

A joyful heart is good medicine, but a crushed spirit dries up the bones.
Prov. 17:22

All the days of the afflicted are evil, but the cheerful of heart has a continual feast.
Prov. 15:5

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oneagleswings
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PostSubject: Re: Grudges   Wed Nov 09, 2011 8:51 pm

"Sens"...how very Christian and non-judgmental gotta' love it!
It's amazing I thought of how I was being judged in the world but I find amongst Christians it is at a heretofore uncharted level.
Who are any of us to say whom has forgiven whom?
I'm sure you've all taken issue with friends or family over past actions and rightly so, doesn't mean you don't forgive them.
My door is always open to my family for example but I'm not sending for anyone in a chauffeur driven limousine anytime soon. If that's holding a grudge then I guess I'm guilty.
"Grudge not one against another, brethren, lest ye be condemned: behold,
the judge standeth before the door." James 5:9
We can quote counter quote all day, truth is you have'nt seen through my eyes and I haven't seen through your's trying to generalize God and using scripture to re-inforce your point.
I was told to shake the dust off from off of my sandals by my spiritual director but from the outside looking in it would seem as if I don't love my family. When in fact I do and miss them very much but not more than God and I wouldn't risk losing that relationship by becoming enmeshed by all their drama.

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Lora
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PostSubject: Re: Grudges   Wed Nov 09, 2011 9:04 pm

You have raised a very good point oneagleswings. There is a difference between forgiveness and letting people walk all over you. It is one thing to forgive someone who has wronged you, but quite another to let them do it again. We are also told to guard our hearts. I don't think Christians are to be the world's personal punching bags. So, you would be completely justified and right in not allowing yourself become enmeshed in your family's drama.

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PostSubject: Re: Grudges   Wed Nov 09, 2011 9:16 pm

There are so called "Super Christians" within my family who are in denial of the things my family has done to me which I know full well you've also experience Lora, who speak against me not for the things I've done and what God has forgiven me for. I am ready to have an honest dialogue with any of them at any time, I'd do it right on this site if they would be willing.
What would come out and what they deny would not be pretty, It is simply tip of the iceberg what I have mentioned on this site.
This is why my detractors do not confront me directly, they have guilt and shame of their own but do not refrain from voicing character assassinating gossip.
They are afraid of having revealed the poor choices they've made but do not hesitate to point out others'.
I absolutely refuse to engage in gossip!


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